u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
