Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
how does that bad decision feel?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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