my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize