Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
