I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
zippers are such a cool invention
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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