epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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