Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
