I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
