I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
