why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
where am i from again
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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