It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
