My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
