But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I got inside last night via doggy door
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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