well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
she peed on how many people?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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