in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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