I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
