i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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