i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
