Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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