I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Randomize