Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
