That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
