Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Mom said you looked used
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
