we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize