I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I just forgot I was standing up.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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