Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
