sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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