You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
