That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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