She announced her abortion via fbk
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
