My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize