The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
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