I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize