I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
