Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My vagina just clenched in fear
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
