If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Randomize
