glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
