I don't usually arrange sex via text message
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
so much tequila, so little girl.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
