Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize