Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
