Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Randomize
