They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
