we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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