So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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