bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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