Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
