Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
