he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize