I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
