Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I see more hoeing in ur future
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize