I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
