Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
