walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
