I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
