we're blogging at a bar
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
