i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
